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FDE 5-3-2011

READER SUBMITTED FASHIONABLE DEFENSE ENSEMBLE OF THE DAY

Today's FDE was submitted by a good friend of mine who I've known for over 13 years.  I can't say anything too mean about him in this FDE post because he possess incredibly embarrassing photos of me from our high school prom.  Our reader is a law school graduate working in the field of patent law.  He also happens to be a heavy drinker.  He and I may differ in certain political views, but we tend to see eye to eye when it comes to life saving equipment.  Our reader chooses to carry a Surefire G2 flashlight in black.  It matches most suits better than oliver drab green or desert tan.  The crazy contraption over the lens is a red flip-up filter.  This comes in particularly useful during office espionage missions where a low profile is needed.  The red light is more subdued and will not attract as much attention or adversely effect night vision like a white light would.  I imagine this red filter gets a lot of use after a night of binge drinking then trying to locate those contracts for his morning meeting.

Since alcohol often means being obnoxious and hitting on other peoples' girlfriends, my buddy is a likely target for morning-after assaults.  Lost, hungover, and in a state of mental disarray puts him at a slight disadvantage when people are trying to kick his ass for whatever expensive suit he puked on the night before.  For this reason, my old chum is rarely without his Spyderco P'Kal folding knife.  The exact same blade I am usually carrying.  Razor sharp S30V steel in a reverse, edge-in grip is available at lightning speed with the built in "wave" feature of the knife.  It's the perfect tool for defending your life against a butt-naked Ken Jeong that comes flying out of your car trunk armed with a golf club that you didn't know was there because you roofied yourself the night before.

Since kidnapping a small Korean doctor often leads to abducting Mike Tyson's pets... a knife may not be enough.  Our reader's pistol of choice is a Series 80 Colt Combat Commander.  This was actually my personal gun for several years before I sold it to our FDE submitter.  Naturally the pistol is a single-stack, 45 caliber piece.  The frame and slide are all steel.  The gun was worked over by a pistol-smith to my personal specifications.  The sights are modified Novak's with a green tritium dot in the front and tritium bars in the rear.  The feed ramp was polished, the ejection port flared, and the springs replaced with a Wolf spring kit to ensure reliability.  Truly a gentleman's weapon, I decided it needed a French boarder and hi-power cuts milled in to the slide.  The top of the slide was also flattened and serrated to prevent glare, and well because I thought it looked cool.  The magazine well was flared to facilitate smoother reloads, the grip was hand checkered, and a high relief cut was made at the back of the trigger guard to allow for the gun to really mate with the user's hand.  Finally a Wilson Combat beavertail grip safety was hand fit to the pistol.

OSAMA BIN DEAD

US Threat Level drops from ORANGE to DISCO-BALL

It's been over a decade since the manhunt for Osama Bin Laden began.  Last night, our President was finally able to declare that the hunt was over and that Bin Laden, the super-turd himself was dead, apparently killed by a team of SEALs and Delta Force operatives.  This is likely the last frightful image Osama saw before meeting his maker:

While I immediately imagined President Obama running around the White House bumping chests and barking at his staff while blasting DMX songs (And no... not because he's black, that's just how I party), I took a moment to remember that Osama was a person too and that the way of the Tao teaches us that we are all part of the same natural spirit.  THEN I remembered what he did to all those people on 9/11.  I put my DMX album on full blast and started break-dancing in my living room.

We have to remember though that Osama was just one of the first heads in the human centipede that is al Queda.  The war isn't over.  As Chuck Norris leads our men and women of the US military to fight enemies in foreign lands, we have to remember that the enemy is also here on our soil already.  Navy Seals won't be here to stop the next terrorist that tries to shoot up a school or bomb a building.  An armed citizen or an off-duty police officer might be though.  So let's not forget our responsibilities to our fellow citizens and most importantly, our family.  Train, train, train, and always have your weapons with you!  When it goes down, you want to have the physical ability, skills, tools, and proper mindset to take care of business.  

Celebrate today, but the war continues.  Eject your DMX disc and swap in the Jay-Z, because it's "On to the Next One" baby.  Rot in hell Osama.  The rest of your boys will be joining you soon.  Thank you President Bush, President Obama, and the heroic members of our United States military.  TEAM AMERICA! F*CK YEAH.

WHITE HOUSE!!!!!!!!!